Narnia's Neigh-bours

Book Review: THE HORSE AND HIS BOY
Written by: C. S. Lewis
Illustrations by: Pauline Baynes
Originally published in: 1954
HarperCollins edition printed in: 1995
175pages
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[SPOILERS] The fourth novella written by C. S. Lewis in his celebrated Chronicles of Narnia series, The Horse and His Boy wasn’t published until fifth (held back until after 1953’s The Silver Chair), and – just to confuse matters further – it is promoted to third if the fantasy saga is ordered chronologically. This is the (questionable) system I am following in my leisurely read through, having already digested prequel The Magician’s Nephew (reviewed HERE) and The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe – a story so universally revered I skipped on a review (but loved it all the same).

Contrary to the ease with which I picked up and sped through the previous entries, I really struggled to break through The Horse and His Boy’s uninviting opening chapters. I actually stopped reading it for some weeks just because it felt so disparate to what I was expecting/hoping for. Although it is set during the reign of High King Peter and his brother and two sisters (the Pevensie children), it is a very different story indeed. For one thing, it does not offer the reader a real world framework or ordinary human protagonists with which to associate, and - most bizarrely - it doesn't actually even take place in Narnia, either.

Simian Says...

DVD Review: PLANET OF THE APES
12 – 107mins – 1968
Screenplay by: Michael Wilson and Rod Serling
Based on the novel “Monkey Planet” by: Pierre Boulle
Directed by: Franklin J. Schaffner
Starring: Charlton Heston, Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter, Maurice Evans, James Whitmore, James Daly, Lou Wagner, Linda Harrison, Robert Gunner, Jeff Burton
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[SPOILERS] With franchise prequel/reboot, Rise..., mere days from release (and somewhat inspired by Film Intel's continuing trawl through the original quintet of films), I thought it was high time I journeyed back to the beginning and revisited our first glimpse of The Planet of the Apes. Over the last 43 years, Frankin J. Schaffner's iconic sci-fi has spawned four theatrical sequels, two television series, a Tim Burton remake and all manner of expanded universe fiction. There’s no denying it: these damn dirty apes are damn popular!

Astonishingly, the slick 1968 production still holds up to this day. The prosthetic ape make-up by artist John Chambers looks just as believable as it did in Tim Burton’s far more extravagant (but far less positively received) 2001 re-Apes, while the plot – based on a 1963 novel by Pierre Boulle – is triumphant in delivering a resounding high-concept allegory in a powerful yet clear narrative.

A quartet of astronauts led by stern alpha male Taylor (Heston) awaken from a long voyage in deep sleep hibernation to find their craft has crash landed on an unknown world in the year 3978AD. Due to time dilation, they have only aged 18 months, but they must come to terms with the fact that everyone they knew on Earth has been dead for centuries. Now they must traverse this sparse, barren, alien landscape if they ever hope to return to what they once called home.

I really admire the steady, almost calm, pacing of this film – and that is in no way a backhanded compliment. Devoting the first 30minutes to a slow desert jaunt is something today's ADHD Hollywood simply wouldn't allow; other than finding a patch of fauna and snapping at one another, bugger all really happens but it lulls the audience into a false sense of security and we obtain great insights into the conflicting personalities of this minimalist cast before the groundbreaking revelations rock their world.

The socially aware subtext cleverly incorporates denouncements of race and class divisions, animal cruelty and the age-old showdown between science and faith – timeless issues which still rage today – yet Planet of the Ape's plot is essentially very simple: Taylor is captured by the dominant apes and caged like a mute, primitive pet until his power of speech convinces certain open-minded simians – animal psychologist Zira (Hunter) and her archaeologist fiancé Cornelius (McDowall) - that he may be the “missing link”; a key to unlocking the secrets of their past, while others – the shady Dr. Zaius (Evans), keeper of the faith – believe Taylor's appearance to be a Pandora's Box which should never be opened...

The sedate and speculative script offers up a feast of perfectly placed and powerfully executed twists and reveals which move the story along terrifically, from the condition of female astronaut Stewart (Dianne Stanley) to Landon's (Gunner) lobotomised zombification. Much to the credit of the film-makers (but the detriment of the climax), the iconic final shot of the Statue of Liberty has embedded itself in public culture (it's even on the front of the DVD case for Zaius' sake!) and it barely registers as a twist anymore – but can you imagine that ending catching you off guard in a cinema in 1968? Now that's a sucker punch!


In a CR@B Shell: Forget about Tim Burton's awkward modern rehash and immerse yourself in a slice of prototypical vintage science fiction. Enjoy either as first rate avant garde eye candy or dig a little deeper to unearth its societal message; Planet of the Apes really is an advanced breed of film-making.
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What Makes a Manimal?

DVD Review: THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU
12 – 99mins – 1977
Screenplay by: Al Ramus and John Herman Shaner
Based on the 1896 novel by: H. G.Wells
Directed by: Don Taylor
Starring: Burt Lancaster, Michael York, Nigel Davenport, Barbara Carrera, Richard Basehart, Nick Cravat, Fumio Demura
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I had actually ordered the much-detracted Marlon Brando-starring 1996 remake – a film I never hated as much as the general consensus yet I hadn't actually seen since I last watched my now obsolete (well, in my house at least) VHS copy waaaay back in the day. When this earlier adap of H.G. Wells' sci-fi allegory of man's overly controlling attitude towards nature arrived in error (no doubt due to its lack of popularity, the newer film is darn hard to obtain, while this '77 version was granted a 2008 Optimum re-release), I decided to give it a look-see nonetheless.

Michael York – exasperatingly, a man I will evermore regard as Basil Exposition from Austin Powers – plays the re-named protagonist Andrew Braddock, washed ashore on an exotic island after surviving the sinking of his ship. Taken in by the tropical isle's sole household, Andrew becomes a guest of the scientist Dr. Moreau (Lancaster), a brilliant and determined man who conducts his radical research with the help of an associate, Montgomery (Davenport), and a slew of Neanderthalic servants native to the island.

As Braddock awaits the next cargo ship to hitch a ride home, he begins to learn more about Moreau's unorthodox experiments; inhumane experiments which tamper with the untamperable. Convinced he can create a race of fully sentient animal/human hybrids who will live in a “civilised” society and abide by a set of laws much like man does, Moreau plays God and threatens to turn this lush jungle paradise into a sinister and ugly living hell.

With a concept which drips “exotic”, "perverse" and “bizarre” from every pore, I was disappointed that this seventies incarnation was a rather flat and dispassionate depiction. Lancaster's Moreau may be visually akin to his prose namesake (something Brando's outlandish reinvention certainly wasn't), but he was far too calm and blasé for a man so utterly devoted to a cause that he is blind to reason. I never believed that he truly believed in his monstrous vision, and I likewise failed to sense a strong-enough objection from York's ostensibly outraged Braddock.

Furthermore, the make-up and creature effects – while undeniably impressive for their time – failed to really sell the atrocious aspect of Moreau's Frankenstein hybrids. The pack of communicative man-beasts, led by the creature known as Sayer of the Law (Basehart), are too pretty and cuddly to truly sway the argument against meddling with the codes of life. Some may rebel, true, but that is also true of humanity – where are the abhorrent freaks and hideously deformed trial runs which would reinforce the abortion of such practise? What we see here are minor variations on designs from The Planet of the Apes – and Charlton Heston snogged one of those!

I was left with the lamentable impression that while H. G. Wells wrote The Island of Dr. Moreau with a grand philosophical message to impart to his audience – a message both capturing the zeitgeist of the technologically-naive-yet-scientifically-curious late nineteenth century and concurrently timeless due to its intrinsic interrogation of what makes a man – this 1977 film was made simply because the filmmakers thought it would look totally wizard to have actors don animal masks post-Apes and not because they had an interesting argument to supplant or support Wells' wise words.


In a CR@B Shell: A shallow and toothless splicing of a revolutionary concept watered down by a lack of passion for the argument, The Island of Dr Moreau 1977 is watchable enough fantasy fare (and it certainly isn't the most despised of the novel's adaptations), but “middling” still doesn't do justice to such a powerful and prototypic prose parable.
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War on Terra

DVD Review: BATTLE FOR TERRA
PG – 76mins – 2007/2010
Story by: Aristomenis Tsirbas
Screenplay by: Evan Spiliotopoulos
Directed by: Aristomenis Tsirbas
Starring the voice talents of: Evan Rachel Wood, Luke Wilson, David Cross, Brian Cox, Chris Evans, Danny Glover, Amanda Peet, Justin Long, Dennis Quaid
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Taking nothing away from the mind-blowing aesthetic splendour of James Cameron’s envi-fi epic, it’s not exactly blasphemous to acknowledge that Avatar’s allegorical plot was hardly original. Dances with Na’vi’s and Ferngully in Space are two predictable but appropriate analogies, but perhaps the closest comparison is to this animated extravaganza of Russian origin from director Aristomenis Tsirbas, which actually first premiered some three years before the long-awaited trip to Pandora launched into cinemas.

Unfairly – but unsurprisingly – eclipsed at the box office by its long-awaited and over-hyped cinematic blood brother, Battle for Terra manages to condense its invaders-versus-natives into a much bum-friendlier runtime. Humanity is once again the bad guy – wishing to occupy a lush alien world after the destruction of Earth in a civil war between terraformed colonies – with a sole dissenting voice (human pilot Jim Stanton, voiced by Luke Wilson) siding with the passive under siege Terrian’s.

Released theatrically in 3D – but only available on a vanilla DVD with less-than-stellar 2.0 soundtrack; a clear sign of an underperforming rush-release – the extraterrestrial landscapes are gorgeously and vividly presented, it’s just a shame that the animation is let down by caricatured human’s and an alien race which look like bug-eyed floating sperms (well someone had to say it).

However, the same cannot be said for the beyond impressive roster of A-list stars lending their voices to the project: Evan Rachel Wood, Luke Wilson, David Cross, Brian Cox, Chris Evans, Danny Glover, Amanda Peet, Justin Long and Dennis Quaid all must have seen something in the script which appealed to their artistic integrity, because I can’t imagine their paycheques were that influentially spectacular.

Being a huge fan of sci-fi ‘toon Titan A.E. (it’s a guilty pleasure, okay?), I was interested to see this recent addition to the rather specific sub-genre, but aside from the futuristic locale, the two films have very little in common. The decade-old Joss Whedon-scripted adventure (also a staggeringly poor performer in cinemas; it actually bankrupted the studio who made it) is an action-packed thrill ride; bright and fun and as easy on the brain as it is on the eyes.

What marks Battle for Terra out as different from the pack of CGI features is also perhaps the reason for its own financial failure: exaggerated character design aside, it isn’t a fun-filled laugh fest, but a very sombre and thoughtful anti-war dissertation on unity and compassion for life regardless of race, colour or creed. Even Arrested Development’s David Cross – as robotic duct between the warring factions, Giddy – isn’t the bumbling R2-D2-alike comic relief you may expect but a more logical diminutive companion.

That’s not to say there aren’t plenty of spaceship chases, explosions and action sequences in Terra, only that they clearly weren’t the driving force behind the enlightening story. Children and adults alike will find many diverse reasons to like this vibrant eco-friendly metaphor, but you may find that when the credits roll you’re more content with its charm than exhilarated by its booms and bangs, while the more sensitive little ‘uns may be quite emotional at the rather adult anti-Disney conclusion to Jim’s personal journey.


In a CR@B Shell: It must be tricky to market an animated science fiction opera which is as passionate about its poignant message as it is its dazzling skirmishes amongst the stars, but this Battle is far from Terra-ble and you’re bound to be won over by the native’s plight, so long as you aren’t all Avatar-ed out already.
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Snow More Winter

DVD Review: THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE
PG – 137mins – 2005
Screenplay by: Ann Peacock, Andrew Adamson, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely
Based on the novel by: C. S. Lewis
Directed by: Andrew Adamson
Starring: Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, William Moseley, Anna Popplewell, Tilda Swinton, Liam Neeson, James McAvoy, Ray Winstone, Dawn French, Michael Madsen, Patrick Kake, Shane Rangi, James Cosmo, Jim Broadbent
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I fear my initial reaction to this epic fantasy adaptation – one I made upon leaving the cinema in December 2005, and stubbornly held until last night – was somewhat harsh. I far too quickly dismissed Andrew Adamson’s The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe as nothing more proficient than the late eighties BBC mini-series, albeit with superior CGI. But viewing the first film in the saga for a second time – and in the perspective of the successive entries in the series (reviewed HERE and HERE) – made my appreciation blossom. Either that or I’m getting soft in my old age…

True, the four young actors taking on the Pevensie children – for the first time, it must be noted, they do improve as the films progress – are at times frankly appalling actors (particular the lads Moseley and Keynes whose voices lack any kind of expressive tone or depth), but with so much magic and wonderment flurrying around them any faults are often blanketed over like the snow from Narnia’s eternal winter.

As I revisited Mr Tumnus’s (McAvoy) home for tea, crumpets and sardines, and trekked across frozen lakes with Mr and Mrs Beaver (voiced by Winstone and French respectively) on the way to meeting the mighty Aslan (Neeson) and joining his army to combat the White Witch, Jadis (Swinton), what struck me most about Lewis’s children’s fable is how bleak and frightening it all is: Narnia under the White Witch’s rule is not a pleasant place, with foxes being mauled by wolves, fauns being turned to stone and children being chained up and slapped for asking questions.

Indeed, even as the snow thaws and the sons of Adam and daughters of Eve (that’s human children, FYI) bring hope back to the whitewashed landscape, Aslan’s blatantly allegorical sacrifice upon the Pagan-esque Stone Table in place of traitorous Edmund (Keynes) is hardly family viewing, with all manner of grotesque demonic creatures (minotaurs, dwarves, giant bats, etcetera) all baying for the lion’s blood under firelight.

Of course it’s hardly much of a spoiler for me to reveal that good eventually conquers evil with Aslan making a magnificent return to defeat Jadis once and for all (though Swinton still manages to wangle appearances in both follow-ups to date), but not before Peter (Moseley) has done his fair share of sword fighting and Edmund has been stabbed. Thank heavens for little Lucy’s (Henley) gift from Father Christmas (Cosmo): a healing potion which makes all battle scars vanish – all except the ones imprinted on the adolescent audience’s brains, that is.

So, allegorical meaning or not, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe doesn’t escape representing some truly adult horrors, even if they do all happen in the back of a magical closet and feature a menagerie of talking critters. This may sound like a negative observation, but trust me it is not: I say bravo to Adamson and his crew for not bowdlerizing some of the more intimidating imagery and granting Narnia a truly visionary scope. I guess we’ve all got to grow up some time; we may as well do it in the comfort of a good film.

In a CR@B Shell: A multifaceted, uncompromising and surprisingly re-watchable treat for the whole family. What better time to indulge upon a second peek inside the wardrobe then at Christmas when we wish we had as much snow as Narnia. Turkish delight, anyone?
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On Stronger Tides

Cine Review: THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER
PG – 105mins – 2010
Screenplay by: Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely, Michael Petroni
Based on the novel by: C. S. Lewis
Directed by: Michael Apted
Starring: Georgie Henley, Skander Keynes, Ben Barnes, Will Poulter, Simon Pegg, Gary Sweet, Laura Brent, Liam Neeson, Tilda Swinton
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Dragons, sea serpents, supernatural mists, invisible mansions, ancient spell books, mermaids, tempests, enchanted jewels – The Voyage of the Dawn Treader really is a phenomenal treasure chest of fascinating fantastical tropes; bright and fun enough for little 'uns to gawp at, but with enough substance to keep mum and dad emotionally engaged too.

This third visit to the magical realm of Narnia sees the youngest two Pevensie children taking to the high seas aboard the eponymous royal vessel with brattish cousin Eustace Scrubb (Poulter) reluctantly in tow. Like the choppy Silver Sea on which the ship travels toward the Eastern Islands in search of seven lost lords, there’s never a dull moment in this spirited and pacey threequel.

With Michael The World Is Not Enough Apted taking over directorial duty from series kick-starter Andrew Shrek Adamson (who stays on as producer) and a wisely tighter run-time, it seems like doubtful former co-financiers Disney jumped ship on this revitalised saga one instalment too soon: the magic has returned to Narnia with full force.

I will admit that I too was sceptical after 2005's The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe offered nothing that the BBC adaptation hadn’t delivered nearly two decades previous, and 2008's Prince Caspian (reviewed HERE) was a bloated and battle-heavy curiosity which favoured excess over heart, but C. S. Lewis’s allegorical series is back on track with this far stronger pirate-flavoured escapade.

Most impressively, Dawn Treader perfectly implements character growth into the finely balanced mix of humour and wonder which enthralls without over-indulging: young Lucy (Henley) is conscious that she isn’t as pretty as older sister Susan (Popplewell), brother Edmund (Keynes) is sick of constantly playing second fiddle, while comic juggernaut Eustace’s reluctance to believe in this illogical wonderland manifests itself in insolence.

With a little help from the-now-King Caspian (Barnes, Spanish inflection now absent) and his multifarious crew, a wish-fulfilling spell, a magic lake, a transformative gold bracelet – and not forgetting wisecracking and courageous mouse Reepicheep (Pegg, replacing Izzard) – the trio learn a myriad of life lessons whilst also having the time of their lives locating the Narnian lord's seven lost swords to lay upon Aslan's (Neeson) table and defeating the haunting green mist which lures them to evil with nightmarish visions. It’s all go!

Whether it’s too late to save this (comparatively) underperforming franchise from a premature termination remains to be seen, but I certainly have faith that there are great adventures to be chronicled from Narnia’s plentiful shores – particularly given how skilfully they have tailored this rather conservative source novel into a pacey and action-packed extravaganza. And at the end of the day isn’t faith what these stories are all about anyway…?


In a CR@B Shell: A spirited and spectacular family friendly fantasy which sailed far beyond my expectations: Voyage is a bright and promising new dawn for Narnia; Lewis would be proud.
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Faith, Hamlet and Shtick

DVD Review: THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN
PG – 148mins – 2008
Screenplay by: Andrew Adamson, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely
Based on the novel by: C. S. Lewis
Directed by: Andrew Adamson
Starring: Ben Barnes, Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, William Moseley, Anna Popplewell, Eddie Izzard, Sergio Castellitto, Peter Dinklage, Ken Stott, Warwick Davis, Liam Neeson, Tilda Swinton
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Being granted the exclusive opportunity to see an advanced screening of Voyage of the Dawn Treader 24hours prior to its release this week (a minor perk of owning a Cineworld Unlimited Card; review to follow), I thought it only right that I should see the threequel in context by finally catching up with the second chronicle in the recently rekindled Narnia saga.

It has been five years since I was underwhelmed by The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe in the cinema, but that has such an enduring story that – thanks to the BBC adaptation which I rewatched repeatedly as a child – it will stay with me forever. In contrast, I had absolutely no idea what to expect from Prince Caspian, having ventured no further into either the novel series or BBC broadcasts, except that it took nowhere near enough money at the box office for Disney to desire to continue co-financing the remaining C. S. Lewis stories.

If the trivia section of IMDb is to believed, prior to the filming of this big budget follow up, there were worries from director Andrew Adamson and his co-writing cohorts Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely that the story of Prince Caspian was too talky and lacking in adventurous splendour when compared to Aslan’s (Neeson) Bible-riffing sacrifice and the epic battle against the White Witch (Swinton) in the well-known series opener.

Thus, the resultant feature film may differ vastly from its slimline prose origins, but it certainly doesn’t disappoint when it comes to blockbuster battle scenes, of which there are scores. Indeed, after a slow burn first half which sees the Pevensie siblings transported back to Narnia’s shore, Prince Caspian mounts towards a crescendo of titanic clashes for its final hour, with all manner of creatures showing their worth with a weapon as the submissive Narnian’s join forces with the eponymous Prince (Barnes) to reclaim their land from the invading Telmarine army.

There are definite shades of Shakespeare in the story of a young prince usurped by a jealous uncle who murdered the king to claim the throne (coughHamletcough). Furthermore, I’m not entirely sure why the Telmar’s are all Hispanic (even Brit Barnes adopts a Spanish accent which has apparently been dropped for film three), given that the fact they are humanoid already disassociates them adequately from Narnia’s animal populace, who have been thought extinct in the 1300 years since the royal Pevensie brood returned to war-time London through the wardrobe.

The immense passage of time is perhaps one reason why this return to Aslan’s domain feels entirely disparate to the preceding visit, despite the same cast and crew’s participation (even Tilda Swinton turns up for an ice-entombed cameo). Personally, I always favoured the snow-steeped eternal winter scenes in The Lion..., but the supernatural gloss of the ethereal white landscape all disappeared when the White Witch was defeated and summer returned to New Zealan- I mean, Middle Eart- NARNIA. Sorry, bad hobbi- HABIT!!

Aslan’s role is also far reduced in this sophomore entry, with the God-like lion nothing more than a fabled memory for the faithful to cling onto. Oh yes, Lewis’s “subtle” allegory of faith hasn’t been scarified in this twenty first century adap a la The Golden Compass, even in the midst of copious castle sieges and sword fights. But when you’ve got nearly two and a half hours to play with, you can squeeze a lot in, with numerous glances even alluding to a ludicrous underlying romance between elder sister Susan (Popplewell) and the Telmarine Prince!!

Sure, Mr. Tumnus and the Beaver’s may all have long since departed Narnia’s mortal plain, but the screen is now clear for a raft of new rabbiting mammals to provide some comic relief for the kiddies; in particular voice-of-reason Trufflehunter (Stott) the badger, and sword-wielding mouse Reepicheep (Izzard) whose persistently squeaky quips fire down many a derogatory comment aimed at his diminutive form. The dwarfs (one of which, naturally, is played by modest-for-hire Warwick Davis), meanwhile, still don’t exactly welcome trust, despite no longer being the White Witch’s minions…

I commend Adamson et al for their bravery and originality in expanding a treasured tome so indiscreetly. For this reason, Prince Caspian was always going to have its (purist) detractors. I was also pleasantly surprised by how little they pandered cringingly to their youngest demographic like the earliest Harry Potter films did – the Telmarine’s political backstabbing and warmongering, for instance, is likely to fly straight over the core audience's heads, but it is essential to setting up the civil war and Aslan’s noble return.

Yet for all the glossy effects, magical spectacle and humanizing themes there is still something about this updated series which doesn’t quite connect with me. Perhaps further depth to the characters and a more affectionate approach to the animal creations would invite viewers to bond more sincerely with the personal issues which affect the inhabitants of this world, instead of the overly cluttered approach which weighs down Caspian’s lengthy runtime and barely grants half of the cast more than a (snappy) line of dialogue.


In a CR@B Shell: Efficiently entertaining for its duration, but Prince Caspian’s appeal is as fleeting and shallow as the CGI effects which dominate Narnia’s bustling landscape. By no means an epic fail, but the warmth must be resurrected to stop The Dawn Treader from sinking.
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