New “Who” Review Run-through

Greetings most patient CR@B fans! My tardiness with recent Doctor Who reviews hasn’t been through sheer laziness, cross my claws and hope to fry! A busy period at work followed by a holiday in Cyprus (oooh, get me!) has left me trailing behind the UK transmission dates somewhat (hey, a CR@B’s gotta get some downtime!!), so in the interest of getting back up to speed, here are three slim-line reviews of episodes 5.6, 5.7 and 5.8…

“THE VAMPIRES OF VENICE ”
BBC One – 8/5/2010 – 6:00pm
Written by: Toby Whithouse
Directed by: Jonny Campbell

Following Amy’s (Karen Gillan) impassioned pass at the Doctor (Matt Smith) at the close of “Flesh and Stone”, the Time Lord turned Cupid in “The Vampires of Venice” by popping out of a giant cake and whisking Amy’s estranged earth-bound fiancé Rory (Arthur Darvill) away from his Stag do and on a romance-rekindling date to Venice . In 1580. “It’s this or tokens!” quipped the Doctor, again on fine bantering form in another witty, humorous, historical romp with added, err, bite. Well this episode was written by the creator of ace supernatural drama Being Human, so what did you expect: Gondolas and Piazzas?

You see, “Venice” in the sixteenth century – in actuality Croatia in 2010, providing a marvellously believable (and cheaper) stand in – is experiencing a problem with a “plague”, transforming the gifted female students of Rosanna Calvierri’s (Helen McCrory) exclusive “school” into light-opposed, fang-sprouting, blood-loving “vampires”. If you think I’m overusing the punctuation marks then that’s because the whole operation is a perception-filter aided cover for a race of “fish people from space”, on the run through time from their dying world. Their “masterful” plan? To breed the transformed gills– sorry, girls, with the surviving males of their scaly species, who are waiting impatiently in the waters of Venice , before flooding the city so they may thrive again.

It was (intentionally?) anti-climatic and sniggersome that the Doctor was able to disable said water-raising device by flicking a tiny switch atop a rooftop, and third wheel Rory’s (temporary?) reintroduction was suitably awkward: his one-upmanship repartee with the Doctor providing more of a spark than his lifeless relationship with love Amy, but then that is clearly the point. Overall, “The Vampires of Venice” [sic] was a rollicking fun - if throwaway - old-school caper (swashbuckling sword-and-broom fight included), with a zinging script infusing an age-old narrative structure (aliens disguised as humans to con us into saving their race? *yawn*) with life.

CR@B Rating: ***.5

“AMY'S CHOICE”
BBC One – 15/5/2010 – 6:25pm
Written by: Simon Nye
Directed by: Catherine Morshead

I will get straight to the point: this was – thus far – the least successful episode of series five. Flawed, corny and disengaging – and this is coming from somebody who gave the derided “Victory of the Daleks” four stars out of five!! My disappointment at “Amy's Choice” was further aggravated given the calibre of the writer (Simon Nye of Men Behaving Badly fame), the intrigue and anticipation garnered by the quirky trailer at the tail end of “The Vampires of Venice”, and the unforgivable waste of such a high-profile guest star. Infamous lead Toby “Truman Capote” Jones was perfectly cast as the impish and mischievous Dream Lord, but let down by a story which, even after the psyche-twist at the climax, never justified his character or gave him any acceptable cause or motivation whatsoever. He was a knock-off “Q” to the Doctor's Jean Luc, if you will.

Predominantly a character piece dedicated to attempting to validate the doubtful romance between Amy and Rory, “Amy's Choice” saw the travelling trio tossed between the rural community of Leadworth five years in the future, and a disabled TARDIS careening helplessly towards a cold star. Have Rory and a heavily pregnant Amy been living happily-married in a sleepy rural village which is secretly under threat from aliens disguised as curtain-twitching octogenarians, or is it a shared dream? Is the TARDIS doomed to crash and freeze, or is this the communal dream and Leadworth a dull reality? Only the Dream Lord knows, and he isn't telling. What a tease...

I concur that it was a fantastically oddball, Freudian-skirting premise; but the execution was so hokey and pocked with holes as to totally negate my interest. For instance: surely the existence-flitting trio could deduce that the future on Earth isn't reality by the fact that they haven't lived for five whole years?! Furthermore, I failed to believe in the character development drilled into us, even if the episode's dialogue was decently humorous (particularly the remark about the “elephant in the room”). But that was the very least we should have expected from a seasoned sitcom writer.

CR@B Rating: **

“THE HUNGRY EARTH” (PART ONE)
BBC One – 22/5/2010 – 6:15pm
Written by: Chris Chibnall
Directed by: Ashley Way

A two-part story set in a sleepy Welsh village where 2020 looks remarkably similar to the present day? This'll be a cheap-to-film mid-season filler, then, thought I, cynically, upon reading the opening title card. After last week's disappointing dud – and a trailer which failed to grip me – I feared it would be “onwards and downwards” (to ironically quote from the script) for the rest of this highly anticipated new series. Thankfully, “The Hungry Earth” struck gold (albeit in a slow-burning fashion) and made a fool of me for judging an episode from a 30 second tease.

Once you are over the frankly ludicrous scenario that an operation as grand and spectacular as the world's deepest tunnelling drill is being run by a crew of just 3 people (!), you can enjoy this tale of disgruntled lizard-tongued reptilian warriors, the Silurian (making their first Who appearance since the 1980's), reawakened by Wale’s subterranean drilling and remerging to reclaim “their” planet from the “apes” who became the dominant species.

The episode was heavy on build-up – the Homo Reptilia don’t even turn up until well over half way through – and perhaps felt a tad modest compared to more exciting recent jaunts, but a number of neat and well-executed details elevated it above talky groundwork for next week’s purportedly larger-scale conclusion: the Doctor's lack of parental experience in letting schoolboy Elliot (Samuel Davis) walk off alone amid increasing danger highlighted the Time Lord's inhuman weakness; the quarantined town being pitched in premature darkness due to a domed force shield was a nicely disorientating touch; and Silurian Alaya's (Neve McIntosh) silhouette stalking Elliot in the church graveyard was genuinely haunting.

It was an interesting move to keep Amy out of the action for so long in “The Hungry Earth”, and show how her 'boys' handled a situation where her life is at risk, cocooned underground at the mercy of a Silurian surgeon. But in keeping with the episode’s low-key tone, it was a shame that we saw so little of the heavily made-up Bossk-a-likes: the tribesmen of the uprising scouting party scarper the minute female Alaya is captured (and they call themselves warriors?!).

Furthermore, the (human) guest cast – in essence just one small-town family – did little but act as puppets to the Doctor’s stream of orders. Worryingly, he too would have been completely screwed (geddit?) were it not for his multi-purpose sonic screwdriver, which offered a quick-fix solution far too often (though it doesn’t work on un-sticking expanded wooden doors, which was a humorous line in a mainly straight-laced script). But these are minor niggles in an otherwise enjoyable escapade which is sure to get far more epic in next week’s “Cold Blood”.

CR@B Rating: ***.5

Eyes Wide Stone

TV Review: DOCTOR WHO - “THE TIME OF ANGELS” (PART 1)
BBC One - 25th April 2010 – 6:20pm
Written by: Stephen Moffat
Directed by: Adam Smith
Starring: Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Alex Kingston, Iain Glen, David Atkins, Mark Springer, Troy Glasgow, Simon Dutton, Mike Skinner
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[“SPOILERS!”] It is reasonable to declare that this hotly-anticipated new era of Doctor Who has received a somewhat inconsistent response to its first 3 adventures. Is Matt Smith’s Doctor eccentric or clumsy? Is Karen Gillan’s Amy Pond cocky or candid? Is the crack motif clever or unsubtle? Are the myriad of aesthetic changes necessary or indulgent? And who the hell remixed the iconic theme music?! While the general consensus is generally weighing towards the positive, critics cannot decide which of the new instalments most demands a rewatch or a switch off. With “The Time of Angels”, however, I think even the most affronted of die Who-ds can put down their burning effigies of the Mighty Morphin’ Power Daleks and agree that the Stephen Moffat reinvention has found its form, and at its peak, is bloody brilliant Saturday night entertainment. Huzzah!

As more of a general viewer than a dedicated Who fanatic (though admittedly no less judgemental), I was thankful for new recruit Amy’s inquisitive probing of returning enigma and vivacious time-traveller River Song (Alex Kingston), who I must admit to not remembering from her previous appearance alongside David Tennant's Doctor in “Forest of the Dead” (2008). Maybe I was out that night? Regardless, the plucky professor certainly made an impact in this episode, with her bullish charm and emasculating effect over the Doctor, particularly when driving his TARDIS and pointing out his mistake of leaving the handbrake on!!

Conversely, the unseen seekers the Weeping Angels required no re-introduction, as their unveiling in the Moffat-penned “Blink” (2007) has etched the statue-esque horrors in my mind as one of the deadliest, scariest and most memorable enemies in one of – if not the – best episode of Doctor Who in recent memory. This sort-of-sequel may not quite have been the flawless masterpiece of their debut, but it was darn close and by no means an illustration of diminishing returns.

Having made a (time) co-ordinated pick-up of River Song from the other side of a 12,000 year gap, the TARDIS-travelling trio were hot on the tail of the spacecraft Byzantium as it crash-landed on a desert world and revealed that the last of the Weeping Angels was hidden like a “hay-like needle of death in a haystack of… statues” (this gem of dialogue was courtesy of the on-form Doctor) in the Maze of the Dead, an ominous and atmospheric temple hidden beneath the earth. So began an Aliens-like hunt through the caverns, accompanied by the future of the Church; an elite team of gun-toting clerical commandos lead by Bishop (Iain Glen).

“The Time of Angels” really was an episode of two halves (and in itself is only the first half of an epic two-parter), with the opening quarter of an hour dedicated to River Song’s exhilarating return before the bubbly, banter-laden tone shifted to a darker shade of tense with Amy getting locked inside a trailer with a Weeping Angel materializing out of the CCTV screen in a nod to The Ring, and the Doctor’s belated realisation that the myriad of deteriorating statues littering the underground grotto were also dying Angels hoping to steal the images of the human team, ratcheting up the feeling of dread by some degree.

As I alluded to in the opening paragraph, public perception is divided over the youthful new teaming of Smith and Gillan, but I for one really like their friendly, teasing repartee which sparkles with witty dialogue: “Do I look that clingy?!” pops Amy after the Doctor suggests she looked deep into the Angel’s eyes. This winning formula was accentuated in this latest instalment by the effervescent River, who also packed a verbal punch. “River, hug Amy,” requested the Doctor. “Why?” asked the professor. “Cos I’m busy,” being but one smirk-worthy example in a vibrant, well-written script.

Yet it wasn’t only laughs which made “The Time of Angels” a superior outing: this was family entertainment which wasn’t afraid to scare; the budget was used spectacularly to give a visual veneer far above the BBC’s usual sound-stage standards; and commando Bob’s (David Atkins) chilling monotone delivery as he revealed his demise at the hands of the image-stealing statues was genuinely unsettling.

A stone cold classic? Well, we're only half way through the story and it is shaping up to be a monumentous escapade. I cannot wait for next week’s conclusion.


CR@B Verdict: Witty, creepy, tense and packed with action, “The Time of Angels” was an atmospheric delight with a genuine filmic quality which has carved out a new benchmark for Moffat's rejuvinated era.
****.5

Starwell To Heaven

TV Review: DOCTOR WHO - “THE BEAST BELOW”
BBC One - 10th April 2010 – 6:15pm
Written by: Stephen Moffat
Directed by: Andrew Gunn
Starring: Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Sophie Okonedo, Terrence Hardiman, Hannah Sharp, Christopher Good, Catrin Richards, Jonathan Battersby, Alfie Field, David Ajala, Chris Porter
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Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear... after last week's high-flying Moffat/Smith era opener, last night's sophomore episode came crashing down as a great disappointment in ALL areas, which is ironic given that “The Eleventh Hour” was grounded on 21st century Earth, while “The Beast Below” took us on a journey to the stars aboard the 29th century Starship UK; a police state comprising all of England's towns and cities aboard one flying landmass. The country's children are upset, creepy rotating clown-headed “Smilers” (see pic, below) sit in decaying Fairground booths passing judgement on the masses while piping a live feed through to Big Brother, and the gigantic ship's engines aren't making the water vibrate. Hmmmm, can somebody call the Doctor (Matt Smith), or, better yet: a science fiction and fantasy film buff...

I was instantly and continually troubled by the episode's truly unoriginal patchwork plot: from the Discworld-esque locale and Mort-dressed surveillance Minders, to the grimmy Blade Runner aesthetic of the post-apocalyptic environ, not to mention numerous cringeworthy Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy (Amy in her nightgown for the entire episode) and Star Wars (“My only hope”; garbage chute) references. In short, there was not a single innovative theme, character or device in the entire hectic 45 minutes. But it wasn't only classic genre pieces that Moffat borrowed from: modern science-fiction was also mined in the form of Lost-like video diaries as evidence of the hidden truth behind Starship UK's engine-less flight, and a Protest/Forget button in the Voting Booth somewhat simplifying the red-pill/blue-pill quandary facing Neo in The Matrix.

I wish I had been able to chose 'Forget' and erase any memory of this below-par adventure, especially when the gothic-gowned Phantom of the Opera impersonator trailing the Doctor turned out to be Liz Ten (Sophie Okonedo), the future Queen of England (with the most annoying “common” accent ever: “I'm the bloody Queen, mate. Basically, I rule.” *cringe*) who has been kept in the dark about the horrific and inhumane truth behind her country's Pratchett-plagiarising propulsion practises, pushing the episode's primary concern over the children's safety to the background for far too long (while Hannah Sharp's schoolgirl Mandy stood around idle yet still in shot).

Furthermore, I can't say I was overly taken by Matt Smith's portrayal of the Doctor this week; he is clearly comfortable in the role but I found myself getting more and more exasperated by his increasingly kooky asides and scatty persona, which failed to make me smile like Tennant used to. It also seems like more of an act, given how ridiculously well-informed he truly is. You may feel I am being overly hard on “The Beast Below”, so I will leave you on a positive note (yes, there is one); the plot climaxed with an emotional intensity which really helped bond the Doctor and his new assistant, as Amy Pond (Karen Gillan) saved the day by making a parallel to the immortal Doctor's loneliness. It was a mature and well acted scene, if only Moffat didn't feel the need to drive the message home by repeating it nearly word-for-word in the star-gazing epilogue, akin to the way the early Harry Potter films spelt out EVERYTHING to aid the youthful demographic.


CR@B Verdict: A hackneyed dud worryingly early on in the new series, the only bright lights being an emotional intensity to the climax and a number of subtle callbacks (Magpie Electricals) and references (like on Amelia's wall, a crack appears on the side of Starship UK) to keep the loyal fanbase content. A prime example of Who trying too hard.
**

A Mad Man With A Box

TV Review: DOCTOR WHO - “THE ELEVENTH HOUR”
BBC One - 3rd April 2010 – 6:20pm
Written by: Stephen Moffat
Directed by: Adam Smith
Starring: Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Tom Hopper, Arthur Darvill, Nina Wadia, Annette Crosbie, Olivia Colman and Patrick Moore
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I have always liked the so-called “new Who” (AKA the Eccleston and Tennant eras), not to the extent that I would record it if I was out, but it always provided good, light-hearted (if occasionally too light) family entertainment on a Saturday teatime. With the dawn of a new Matt Smith-shaped era – and with a new showrunner at the helm following Russell T. Davis's departure – I sat down to watch with great expectations (after all, it's been kinda hard to escape the BBC hype machine in recent weeks); and it's fair to say Stephen Moffat delivered with a superb and dizzying debut.

New showrunner. New Time Lord. New Assistant. New TARDIS. New Sonic Screwdriver – and before the poor Doctor (Matt Smith) has time to adjust to his eleventh regeneration, he crash lands on Earth and has just 20 minutes to defeat a new alien enemy. Well, at least the iconic theme tune is the same – oh, no, wait: that's newly remixed too. Talk about a new brush sweeping clean... and yet, “The Eleventh Hour” wasn't inaccessibly innovative – it was glossier, edgier and had a distinctly more filmic quality (from the – mostly – impressive CG effects to the more dramatic musical score), but it was still comfortingly familiar.

Although he has been on board the show for some time now, Stephen Moffat was clearly out to make a bold first impression in his new head position – “The Eleventh Hour” was Doctor Who Plus: more emotional, more touching, funnier, sexier, scarier and edgier than the previous (and hugely popular) incarnation – but without David Tennant's popularity to fall back on. From the dramatic, flame-hindered TARDIS free-falling across the London night sky to the Piranha-esque "Prisoner Zero" with the ability to take the form of any being it links with psychically, tonight's series opener was an epic thrill-ride.

Based on this first performance, Smith looks set to make the revered role his own with an enjoyably quirky performance (fish fingers and custard!!) packed with humour and a uniquely gawkish quality - yet he was definitely still in control and not out of his depth. His new assistant, feisty Scot Amy Pond (Karen Gillan), certainly made an immediate impact brandishing a cricket bat and wearing a sexy policewoman's kiss-o-gram outfit (see pic, left), but she has a cute, vulnerable quality given her sentimental back story. For Amelia (to give her her birth name) first met the Doctor aged 7 (and played by Caitlin Blackwood) when, immediately following his regeneration, he crashed into her back garden somewhat confused and hungry for apples... this had a severe impact upon the young orphan's life – the Doctor promised to return in 5 minutes but doesn't return for 12 years*, in which time Amy has had to see four psychiatrists to get over her 'imaginary' friend, the “Raggedy Doctor”...

I felt the plot – involving the escaped "Prisoner Zero" being tracked by intergalactic 'police' known as the Atraxi (giant eyeballs) – got a little confusing at times, as decisions were made and people were rushing this way and that in the blink of a (giant) eye. Furthermore, the scientific mumbo-jumbo was babbled at break-neck speed (particularly while the Doctor was borrowing a man's laptop to piggyback on a worldwide phone call to Patrick Moore!!), yet the outcome was predictably simple: the Atraxi left Earth when they realised Smith was the Doctor. Okay, point made: he's back, with a younger face and a bow tie, but he's still fearsome, even to giant eyeballs with the power to incinerate the globe!! Riiiiight... But then plot, logic and reason are really of secondary importance on Doctor Who, and as a piece of fantasy entertainment “The Eleventh Hour” was first rate.

CRaB Verdict: A CRACKing, if complex, opener for Matt Smith and Stephen Moffat; the Doctor is back in business and I'll definitely be booking an appointment for next Saturday.
****.5
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* What year are we supposed to be in now, then, given that this episode jumps 12 and, in the epilogue, a further 2, years? 2024??!